I Will Pray For You

Last Tuesday, October 7, I went home for lunch to have my nails done. Ate Chit, a former neighbor who used to do manicure and pedicure for us in Bacood, Sta. Mesa still does our nails even if we’re now in Makati. She does it once or twice a month. While we were all together chatting over lunch—my mother, Ate Chit and I—my mother received a text message from Ate Chit’s relative who is also a former neighbor, Ate Edith.

Ate Edith informed Mama that another former neighbor, Ate Lina, has died. She had been quite sickly lately, we heard, and was also diabetic. During the last few years we spent in Bacood, we seldom saw Ate Lina because she was working in Dubai. When she was in the country, she spent most of her time in Baler, Quezon, which was her hometown. In fact, we heard she would be interred in Baler and may not have the chance to be brought to her other home in Parañaque. But another text message from Ate Edith conveyed that Ate Lina’s son, Michael, is bent on bringing her closer to some of her true friends in Manila.

I could say a lot of things about Ate Lina but a story Mama brought up lately reminded me of an incident when I was young, which was probably my most meaningful moment with Ate Lina. I was probably 6 or 7 years old. My parents’ rule was that we should be inside the house before 6pm because it would soon be dark. During one particular afternoon, I was still eagerly playing outside and had no intention of coming in early. My mother started to call me as soon as daylight started to fade. But I did not heed it until it had become too dark to continue playing. All my playmates went home and I did, too. However, Mama had locked the door deliberately to teach me a lesson. Despite my knocking several times, she did not open the door for me and I knew she heard me.

So I sat on the steps of the neighbor’s unit, which was I think unoccupied at that time, crying, sobbing actually. I’d been there for maybe half an hour when Ate Lina passed by. She came from another neighbor’s unit and was on her way home. She approached me and asked why I was crying. I told her. She knocked on our door and called my mother, begging her to let me in. For a few minutes, my mother ignored us, but then changed her mind (probably to save face, because she’d always been more concerned with what other people thought than with what her children felt). She opened, explained to Ate Lina in a raised voice why I was being punished, and let me in while scolding me.

I didn’t care for what Mama continued to say inside the house but I was forever grateful for Ate Lina’s intervention. I knew she was a good person and from then on, I saw her in a different light—different from what people around her used to say about her. And from that day on also, I have disliked my mother’s ways more and more and have decided to “bring up” myself the way I know a child wants to be treated. I’m trying to be as sensitive and careful with the way I bring up my daughter now. Sometimes, I see my mother’s ways in me, sometimes I see my own. I’m a pretty flexible mother and I keep no stone-set rules. But I always prioritize being kind while being right.

Parenting is a make-or-break thing; a child is fragile, handle with care. That’s how Ate Lina had handled me the night I had become one difficult human being. Wherever you are now, Ate Lina, thank you for even one brief moment of kindness. I will pray for you.

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Last Saturday, October 11, Hans Magdurulang, a former member of Our Lady of Fatima Parish’s (Bacood) Knights of the Altar and a contemporary in the Parish Youth Council, was ordained priest at the Manila Cathedral. This was an occasion I’ve long wanted to see, because Hans had been close to us when my siblings and I were heading the PYC committees.

He participated in many church-based youth activities, especially the spiritual preparations leading to the 1995 World Youth Day in Manila such as the Taizé, the Youth Barrio Fiesta, the prayer groups, the singing. He was also part of several plays we staged in church under the direction of a good friend, Josel Garlitos, who is now with ABS-CBN.

While a member of PYC, Hans decided to enter the seminary. He has not wavered in that decision since. Last Saturday, he celebrated his first mass as Fr. Hans Magdurulang in Bacood, where his spiritual roots grew and bore fruit. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the time (or the willingness) to go because I was busy mother-ing. Plus, Bacood brings back some sad memories that I didn’t want recalling, and I know if I attended the mass, there will be people there whose mere presence would open a can of worms I’m keeping tightly closed.

So, I just want to congratulate you, Fr. Hans, for making it through the test of becoming a priest. Maintaining it will be another, longer test. I will pray for you.

Why I think David Cook won

While doing housekeeping on my home PC recently, I found an item that I remember posting on a website in answer to the survey "Why do you think David Cook won the American Idol Season 7"? Late as it may be, I'd like to blog it just for preserving the thought while I savor its meaning in my own life.

Written and posted May 25:

Why I think David Cook won

This may be a profound idea but I think it boils down to the sex and cash theory, "cash" representing the need to do things to earn your keep and "sex" representing the need to do things because it fulfills you.

While David Archuleta appears to sing in the contest for the "cash", rendering a performance to impress judges and audience, his totality as a singer isn't cashable. In the long run, he can be easily overshadowed by other better singers because he cannot trailblaze a trend.

David Cook, on the other hand, seems to sing for the "sex", his motivation being that he's having fun and loving every moment of his performances (mindless of whether everyone else loves it). As such, he is the type who can go a long way in the music industry because he can very well reinvent himself any time and in any way he pleases. He sings to express rather than to impress, and the more he sings from the heart, the more he moves towards his self-actualization.